Opinion: Hotel Flesh is Real

Everyone who slept in the old hotel left a piece of their soul-skin there; this idea cannot be dismissed. They told me to leave the meeting at Town Hall, and I said okay, fine. They told me not to hand out my leaflets, and I soiled myself in protest. Don't you understand that God is under the earth, making Its spirals, squirming and aching. If I could paint what I see when I dream, if I could only, and if I could. What are we but a buildup of coulds.

This week's opinion was submitted by The Boar, so named because of her deformity.

Mr. Grover Fascinated by Garbage

Who's that picking up garbage around town? And why does he keep putting it back down?

Local curiosity "Mr. Grover" is understood to have taken an interest in garbage, and citizens are asked to leave him be; after all, "it's only garbage," says the Mayor.

Leave a bit extra out on the curb tonight—you just might make an old man's day!

We Have Finally Disposed of That Rotting Horse

You may resume fishing at the pond now.