27 December 2014

Small-Town Life

Waffle Town is small. Life moves slowly here. The people here are small, too, and they also move slowly. Even when they're driving in their cars, they're moving pretty slowly, because the cars move slowly here in Waffle Town. On top of that, the cars are small. There are a lot of compact cars here in Waffle Town. They're small, like the people they carry, and the roads they travel on are small as well. No need for wide roads here in Waffle Town.

And you know what? That's what small-town life is all about.

17 December 2014

It's Fruitless

Whoever has been planting banana trees in Grampus Park, please stop. They cannot grow in this climate.

12 December 2014

Christmas Trees, Please

YOU WANT THEM - WE HAVE THEM says the hand-painted sign in the middle of town square, where local entrepreneur Larry Goog, well known for his corner juice carts, has received permission to sell Christmas trees for the remainder of the month. Mr. Goog says he's excited to save residents the hassle of a trip to Burough Acres, long the site of the county's only tree farm. On the origin of his valuable stockpile Mr. Goog declined to comment, only expressing confidence that it contains trees of every size and shape customers might need, and adding that pre-decorated trees are also available for a small extra fee.